Siamese Twins

Ok let's say you have a siamese twin. Ok so you're ok with that, whatever, you guys get along ok, but it was really hard to get a job. But you guys are great, you get one anyway! Do you get paid for one or two people? What about if you go to a movie or something? It seems like you should have to buy two tickets, because you have two butts so you take up two seats, but if you only get one salary, is that really fair that you get paid half us much but pay twice as much? Cus that would suck. Stink. Be bad. Hey but what if one of you is a girl and one is a guy and you want to take each other to prom, but you only buy one ticket. Can they only let one of you in? That would be... hard to do.

Sally's Country Rose Cafe

Removed due to popular demand.

Colors and Smells

I think every color has a smell that goes with it. Like red smells like cherry, and brown smells bad, and green smells nature-y. It's just the way things work, at least for me. Because, you see, if I'm sitting in a class and I see a color, I get a smell in my head. No, I don't actually smell the smell, but I think about the smell that I automatically associate with that color. By the way, blue is my favorite smell.

When Anne told me they were repainting the tech classroom's blue wall red, I was upset. In fact, I've been kinda sad about it all day! That room always had such a good mind smell, but red is a much tackier mind smell. Especially if the wall is being painted by a bunch of kids who are really dumb. No offense to Anne, but besides her I don't know a smart person in that class. Period. This one kid really had to pee, and he hated Mr. Wilson because he wouldn't let him go to the bathroom, so he peed on a couch, then Mr. Wilson told them to move that couch into the classroom, and they did, and the kid that peep on it sat on it. In the same spot. Within half an hour. And he's really stupid cus he got wet... with pee. And he's stupid.

See, stuff like that makes yellow's mind smell bad. Purple is a flowery floral pretty mind smell. White doesn't really have a smell, it's just a clean smell thought. Orange is citrusy. Sometimes. Of course, all this is subject to the mood I'm in. If I'm sad or mad or tired, all this could suddenly change, without warning to you. So the next time you wear blue expecting me to comment on how good you smell, be prepared for me to tell you I stink. That, or you could just all go out and buy Jovan Musk for Men at any local Target or other fine stores and I will love you forever. You could be Mr. Mason and I'd still hang out with you. No, you couldn't be Mr. Garret. Sorry. Except I'm not. I bet that man sat in his own pee, too.

Smile, Someone Loves You

I keep having wonderful days. Each day is more wonderful than the next day, and that's a great thing. And I just thought I'd share. And I hope everyone has wonderful, great, fantastic days. Remember that book Alexander and the No Good, Very Bad Day? I hope you day is the exact flip of that, times 10 extra fun points for good measure! Every last one of you. Because that's what everyone deserves. You heard me, so go out into the world, have a great time, and smile, because someone loves you.

I love:
:) AP classes because they're awesome and my teachers and classmates are "smarter than the gum on the bottom of my shoes," as someone so gracefully said in mentor.
:) My friends, all of them... no, just people in general! I love people! I love everyone! Everyone has their own unique coolness that is just awesome!
:) Books, every kind, from the fun kind, to the German kind, to the History kind. Books are soo fantastic and great and they keep you from being bored.
:) Band is sooo much fun and sooo not boring. It's impossible to be bored in band! Band is great from social interaction, to learning, to expressing. It's fun!
:) Passing periods. Whoever invented passing periods is great! They make so much sense and you have time to go to your locker, which I also love!
:) Sleep. Sleep is the bomb. You get to rest and dream and dreams are so cool, especially when you know how to interpret them or you get your friends to help!
:) Jewelry, clothes (especially long sleeves or t-shirts!) are soo fun! You can wear them and they're pretty and they make you pretty and that's fun!

The list could go on sooo much longer! But I have to do something constructive will all of my built up happy energy!

**More good day ness** **I'm winning!**
As you know, DanTheMan2020202 is forever gone because of the power outage. Energetic56 still leads at just over the 3 and a half day halfway point. Hack1ngyou, our new challenger, logged off after hitting 12 hours but is now back in last place with 3 hours, ahead of Lain1189 by a paltry 20 minutes. Scubaman342, I'm sad to say, is gone once again. Dappudd611 comes back from vacation tomorrow; hopefully, he'll put some spice into this contest. As it is, Energetic56 is simply running away with it. If she can just get that memory problem licked, the grand prize is hers.

Battle of the Sexes, Part 2

It's time to play Battle of the Sexes! This is a fun game that you folks sitting at your own computer can participate in! Just leave a post if you have something to add or want to argue about something that's already on the lists. I'll try to be as fair as I can in the writing of the actual lists, but if one sex really is that much better than the other, then there's not really that much I can do about it, now is there?

Why girls tear the roof off:
1. Can change our minds as often as we want
2. A girl can like guy stuff and she's a tomboy, a guy likes girl stuff, he's gay
3. If we don't shave for a week, no one will know
4. We can talk to our girlfriends about anything
5. We have a purse so we don't have to stuff everything in our pockets
6. No freaky rules to remember about center urinals if there's three
7. Voices don't crack when we go through puberty

Why guys are ok sometimes:
1. Take shorter showers
2. Can be ready to go out in no time
3. No lines to go to the bathroom
4. Girls who date around are skanky sluts, but guys who date around are cool players
5. Have to be macho all the time

Well, do you have something to say? Want your side of the game to be heard? I dare you, leave a post with your opinion in it. It'll be great!

Music and Mosquito Bites

I like music. A lot of different kinds. I like classical, country, jazz, rock, swing, the works. That's right, I said country. I'm a country music fan and I'm proud of it. In fact, I'm listening to country as I write this. I own lots of country cds and I download lots of country music. I love singing along in resturaunts that play it because it embarasses people, especially my brother, and I wonder how many words I spelled wrong in that sentence. But I love music. Really I do. Music is fun to listen to and fun to play. And even more fun to sing along to. I'm so glad God invented music. One time I read a WouldYouRather in a magazine and it was WouldYouRather take a cross country road trip with no a/c or no music? It's been a few months, and I still can't decide. It would be so hot... but so boring... and I don't know which is worse, because luckily I'm fortunate enough to know both worlds.

On another, even worse note (can you imagine something worse) I got bitten by a mosquito! Ahh!! It must have been a few days ago, because it's already healing, but it's very scary! What if I got that disease that everyone knows how to say except for me but I'm the one that's the most scared of it? That would be horrible! It's on my elbow, and now that I know it's there, I'm very scared. I think if i knew the symptoms of the disease, I would start to develop them, kind of like in that I Love Lucy episode. I don't really have a particular episode in my mind, but there is an I Love Lucy episode for everything.

I had a dream about the president. Bush that is. We were married (hmm, common theme of marriage in my dreams...) and he wanted to hang this thing on the wall, but I thought it wasn't straight. Also, he wanted to use tacs, but growing up my mother never let me tac stuff to the wall, if I wanted it on the walls badly enough, I could try to get her to approve of it basically, and then she would screw it in. Putting anything on the walls was a big deal, but I craved for some outlet for my interior decorating heart. So I took to decorating the interior of my closet. I had so much fun, and it was so pretty. One time, this sounds morbid, but I drew a really good picture of a burning, crashing airplane. I hung it up and I was so proud. It was a really good drawing! But Bush wasn't hanging stuff in the closet, he was trying to hang our Key Club banner, the one we recieved at the banquet last year, on the wall with tacs and I wouldn't let him. We argued for a while, then i woke up when the TV turned on and he was on! Some speech or something. What did that have to do with music or mosquitos? Well, I'm sure Bush likes music and what if he got bitten by a mosquito? That's what I thought.

Again

I wrote three paragraphs. Well, two. But then I went and clicked a link to another person's blog, and before I realized the horribleness of what I'd done, my entry was erased. I will try to remember, but no promises. Here we go, again.

Money and Stuff

Let's see, it started with me contemplating checking accounts. You see, my mother told me yesterday that to get a checking account, you have to have good credit. Ok, but see, to get good credit you need a credit card. And you can't just have a credit card either, I thought about that. No, you have to use. Problem is, if you use your credit card, how are you going to pay the bill if you can't mail them a check? I suppose you could mail cash... but wait! How will you get cash? (Pretend you're not spoiled for just a second.) You'd have to have a job! But, how are you going to cash the check your work mails you unless you have a checking account! The cycle is just nuts! But you know people can do it, cus lots of people do. Everyone does. Enough about that.

The next part was about stuff. The great thing about stuff is that it's everywhere. There's stuff in your room, your car, even your washing machine. Heck, your washing machine IS stuff! How great! Stuff makes me happy. Not the same stuff all the time, but when I'm in a bad mood, eventually some form of stuff pulls me out of it. Stuff, or someone else. It really depends on the situation I think. It's like my math teacher told us today: "Some people take notes on loose leaf paper. Others use spirals. You really just have to find your knack, and stick with it." Oh, she is such a middle school teacher.

Since we were already talking about teachers and what they said today, lets talk about all the times I related in my head without meaning to something a teacher said to band. One time a teacher said "tear the roof off." Another time I think my history teacher said "keep on the beat." How could I not think band? Some kid said something about dots today. Polka dots, but dots all the same. Anderson told me a funny thing about Mr. Metronome and Mr. Tuner, and how lonely Mr. Tuner was because all I ever did was play with Mr. Metronome. Mr. Mirror needed attention, too. Man, that guy is just messed up. Living in New Jersey will do that too you.

The Very Essence

I have learned the deepest meaning behind the very essence of Ashley. The mean and nice spurts, the bad jokes, the good ones... The very soul.... of myself. Ashley is only mean so that people will appreciate her when she's not. It's like they say how you have to date a few of the wrong people before the right one so that you will know how much to appreciate the right person when they come. Well, if people only saw NiceAshley all the time, they wouldn't care. It'd just be NiceAshley, walking down the street. But instead what you get is UnpredictableAshley, who is much more interesting and fun to be around. Yeah, she can be mean, but she can be nice, too, and she's funny. So instead of having boring NiceAshley or really scary MeanAshley, you get a somewhat pleasant mix of the best of both worlds-- UnpredictableAshley. UA is my personal favorite because of her uniqueness. She is special, we've esptablished this much. Now let's move on to the less frequent yet ever present Ashleys.


Ashley Numbero Uno: the almost never appearing PMSAshley. PMSAshley doesn't rear her ugly head very often, but when she does, watch out, she takes no prisoners. Btw, I have just been informed that PMSAshley thinks she's good at hiding it. Please, leave an example if you believe she has assaulted you.

Ashley Nummer Twei: OverExcitedAndHyperAshley. OEAHA doesn't appear too much either, not in her strongest form, but she exists much more often than PMSAshley. She's much more fun to be around than PMSA, also, because of her spastic and bubbly personality.

Ashley Number Three (I don't know another launguage): SadAshley. Hopefull SadAshley doesn't hang around too much, but when she does come, she tends to stick around for a while. She's well, sad, and people don't like her so much.

The Next Ashley: FunnyAshley. You know her, she's the one that comes to the party with 8 clean jokes down pat and some dirty ones just for kicks. She can teach you to dance in a minute and make you laugh in an instant. But she just can't be serious. Or Quiet. Or normal

Ashley Number 5: TiredAshley. SleepyAshley. ExhaustedAshley. This Ashley is around a lot. She is quiet, kind of sits back and watches things go on around her. She doesn't fidget much and yawns often. Seen after pulling all-nighters on aim.

Ashley Number SIX: NormalAshley. That's right, I said normal. This is the Ashley that you don't really notice. She blends, and you don't really remember when she came or left. She doesn't steal the spotlight or follow the crowd, she just is.


Alright, I've just named many different kinds of Ashley's. No really, I have. Like, nine of them. And it all started when I was playing minesweeper (I won by the way, advanced, 99 bombs in 250 seconds, beat my old record) and I realized how mean I was sometimes but how nice I could be. Now you know why. You know how my brain works. Don't abuse this information. It could be your best friend. So could I.

The High Life

With summer coming to a close, I've really started thinking about all that it means to me. Summer is just such a great thing. I love summer and I don't want it to end. Here are some fantastic, even bandtastic things about summer:

1. It's long
2. It is often defined as the absense of school
3. Most of the time you get to sleep in
4. You can go to Six Flags on a Tuesday and not get in trouble
5. It's a good time to go swimming
6. There is no homework, not really
7. Band is just more fun in summer
8. You see your friends more often
9. Is anyone reading this?
10.You have oodles of spare time
11. Lots of movies come out
12. You can stay up as late as you want
13. Serious lack of teachers

Those are just a few things I love about summer. The list could go on much longer, but really, who wants to read that?

So summer is the high life. It's the must wonderful time of the year! Wait, that's Christmas. But oh well, I don't like holidays anyway, and that's just one more great thing about summer! No holidays to worry about! Except my birthday. But hey, I can throw a party on whatever day of the week I feel like. And you get to go on vacation. And sit around on aim for 2 days straight if you feel the urge. Ah summer, I shall miss thee.


Now let's talk about school. I would never consider school the high life, but it has its ups. Here's my list for why school is the close to high life:

1. You see your friends every week day
2. You eat lunch with them, but you don't have to sit around and talk about where to go
3. It's free entertainment
4. Lockers are fun because you can put your stuff there
5. You get a new schedule every 12 weeks
6. Sometimes the teachers are really nice
7.Yes, there is homework, but it teaches you good work ethic
8. You pick up on interesting things
9. Gossip

So there you have it. My lists of the high and not so high life. Summer is ending, and I will miss it, but I will move on, I always do. It won't be easy, but if everyone sticks together, we'll all get through this, I know it. That's all for this afternoon. Peace out, yo. Welcome school.

The Future

I've got big plans for my future, I just know it. As far as my future-future goes, I have no idea. I don't know what I want to do or where I want to go with my life, but as for next year, I have a crystal clear picture in my mind. Nails! See, the house next door and the house across the street are for sale. So when new people move in, theres going to be a boy our age, a girl our age, and little kids not our age. The boy will be the boy next door, my new boyfriend (he'll be lovely) and the girl will be my best friend, because of the convinence of it all. Yes, she'll be lovely too, just not the same kind of lovely. Oh, but if she is very lovely, Martin calls dibs. Sorry guys. Anyways, then the little kids are going to be out of diapers, but young enough to need a baby sitter (me, of course!) I now have a new boyfriend, a new bestfriend, and a steady source of income. I'm set for life! How exciting!

Since we're talking about the future, I just want everyone to know that I know how to not die if I'm kidnapped and stuffed in a trunk. See, you pull out all the wires you can, and then the tail lights will be disconnected and the guy will get pulled over by the cops and it'll all be good. Plus I bet if you got kidnapped then got away because you were smart, someone would write an article about you. You'd be famous, AND alive. Then you'll have a future. And I've stayed on topic for 15 minutes!

Now let's talk about my dream. I had a dream that I was in the on the couch when my boyfriend. Not a real person, no one we know, just my boyfriend in my dream. And he reached over and held my hand, and my parents and brother walked in. So the boy left. Then I was in the kitchen with the man I loved. Not anyone we know, not a real person, just the man I loved in my dream. And no, I'm not a player, I was older here, and so is the guy. And he had just put a ring on my finger and he was telling me he loved me, and my parents came in. My mom drove him home while I stayed with my dad and he lectured me, and when my mother came back she said "no, he wasn't proposing to you." Then she tried to calm down my dad, saying that he said he loved her when he was my age. I think what my dream is trying to tell me is that my parents are going to keep in my personal life and ruin it for forever. That's sad. So I'll have the boy next door but only when my parents aren't around. Some future.

The Beginning

Woah, I'm such a follower. I have a blog too. Go me. But it's only to tell the funny stories I think of when no one is around for me to talk to. Or, when I don't want to talk to anyway. In other words, expect some good stories. Because they will be good.

The great thing you fail to realize about a secret blog is that no one knows about it. I can write whatever I want, because unless you for some reason thought I had a blog then set out trying to find it, you wouldn't be reading this. Btw, if you're reading this, I hate you

So let's tell a story, shall we? This morning's story is about homecoming. My mother was bugging me at the play yesterday about making a garter. She wants to make it again this year, I'm fine with that. But...

Her: "So who are you going to go with? Or who do you want to go with?"
Me: "Um, well, Nick is my backup"
Her: "Backup? What in the world?"
Me: "Well, like if neither of us find other dates, we go with each other. It's practically rejection free."
Her: "Well, what's the deadline on this? I want to pick up the supplies tomorrow!"

It went on like that for a while... Finally the play started. Whew. But you know, she's just going to ask me later, and I still won't know the answer.