Wednesday, June 30, 2004

It's been a hell of a day and I'm in a hell of a mood. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm lost. Or stuck. Or dying, something i just don't know what. Complaining doesn't work. Pretending to be happy doesn't work. Thinking about other things doesn't work. Feeling sorry for myself doesn't work. Finding a hobby doesn't work. Trying to explain myself to others doesn't work. I'm so tired of trying to fix everything that fell apart. But I think that if I don't, no one will. So what's a girl to do? Cry. And so that's what I'll do.

Friday, June 25, 2004

NO! I don't WANT to go to college and I don't want any of my FRIENDS to go to college because HERE is perfectly nice and everything is great and why do we have to go and mess things up with a stupid thing like college? That's so retarded. No one likes college anyway. It should just go live in a hole somewhere because it ruins everything and it's bad. The end.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Sometimes I feel like I've known a person for so long that I don't see them for what they actually are, but for what they were when I first met them. Then all of the sudden one day, I realize they're very different than I ever give them credit for being.

Have you ever noticed when you're watching some sitcom that's been on for years and years, and then you go back and watch an episode from the first season, how different everyone is? They've been growing up the whole time and you just don't realize it because you've been watching so closely. But when you take the time to remember the old episodes, you realize how much everyone has changed.

Tuesday, June 22, 2004

Oreos are probably the best cookie ever. They have crispy cookie on the outside and good icing on the inside. They're always dressed for the occasion in their classic black and white, yet sometimes they make things a little more interesting by changing for halloween and easter. There are lots of ways to eat them. Way too many to write here. But it's good because everyone has their own way. They're also good when dunked in milk. And there are lots of spin off oreos, like the inside out ones and the dipped ones and the mint ones. That's why oreos are probably the best cookies ever.

Saturday, June 12, 2004

Last night I had a dream about my guitar. I was going on a trip with a bunch of my friends, but then the guitar was a terrorist threat, so I had to hide it so they wouldn't nuke it! So I was running all through the airport with my guitar case and I finally wound up running into the closet that's in my little cousin Chassie's room. And I crawled through all this stuff and there were grey and white rats, but I wasn't scared, and I hid under a matress and hid the guitar under some other stuff and then my mom and the cops came and they got all mad at me for being a terrorist even though I wasn't and threw me out the window. Then Dad was walking through the cemetary to pick out tombstones, and he decided we don't need one for me, and then they cancelled the funeral. :(

Thursday, June 10, 2004

I read a book called Brave New World because I'm a nerdy little dweeb, and it's a classic. It's by a British guy, written in about the 30s I guess. It's about the future.


It takes place in A.F. 662, which stands for After Ford. As in, the guy who made the Model T. He's their god. They praise him and instead of crossing themselves like good little catholics, trace T's on their stomachs. They said "Thank Ford" and stuff. They think he's smart not only because of those interchangeable parts, but also because they think he and Freud are the same guy, and he just calls himself Freud when he writes.

They live in a 5 caste system, and they condition people to like to be in their caste. There are no mothers or fathers, everyone is born into a bottle from an egg on a table, and in that bottle they travel down a very slowly moving conveyor belt where, according to what you are destined to become, they inject stuff into you. They put poison into the bottles of the lower castes to stunt their growth and make them stupid. They put diffent vaccines in different bottles for your soon to be job. The coal miners won't get black lung and the airplane pilots won't get air sick. All of the lower castes are clones of each other, and it works so that one entire wing of the hospital is run by one set of brothers, and a certain factory is run by one set of sisters. The upper castes aren't cloned because it might weaken them.

No one reads or has any kind of solitary enjoyment. They promote sexuality, especially from a very young age. "Everyone belongs to everyone." It's frowned upon to keep one partner for more than a few weeks, and within that time you shouldn't have just one companion. They take place in religious orgys at least once every other week that are required. They chew special gum to make them horny. There is no such thing as discomfort, because they perfected a drug that you can take as soon as you start to feel unhappy that's an instant upper. In large doses it's like going on a weekend vacation.


There's a plot too, but I already wrote enough about the background. That's all you need to know about the book really, to compare it to real life. In the book, the 10 world controllers' jobs were to preserve uninformity within society, so that no person stood out. People had predestined jobs. Sexual immorality was good. God was not allowed. Drugs were rampant. Everyone is forced to not think and to not read and to not have any sort of solitary time. That, my friends, is a scary place.

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

One time I wrote a whole post. Then I copied it. Then I copied something else. So when I posted it here, it's not here anymore, only that other thing. That other thing. That's sad, and why I don't have a post.

Thursday, June 03, 2004

Don't you think we would look funny if we had two knees on each leg. I don't mean next to each other-that would be weird. I mean like the one where it already is and then another one on your shin. Or maybe they should be spaced out evenly. In my dream last night they were not. I wonder if you would run faster with those extra knees. They were chasing me last night. They ran really fast and caught me, but I don't know if it was because of the extra knees or because I am a slow runner. They weren't aliens or anything either. They were just in the army, but I don't know which one.

Wednesday, June 02, 2004


Amy, looking beautiful as normal, showing me her "bus pass" Posted by Hello



Me and that boy I like. Posted by Hello



Martin and Michelle Posted by Hello



Georg und Maria Posted by Hello



Nick and Michelle on a roller coaster!! Posted by Hello



Nick jammin on the drum simulation Posted by Hello



Michelle and Amy probably beat Martin at pool, but I don't really know. Posted by Hello



Erin and Nathan Posted by Hello



Nick is excited about Pepsi! Posted by Hello



Two wonderfully fake smiles! Posted by Hello


IHOP Posted by Hello

Tuesday, June 01, 2004


Nick has lots of girls on his bed. Posted by Hello



monster cake!!!! it will eat you before you eat it!!! Posted by Hello



Lots of people!! Posted by Hello



A picture of a bunch of pictures. Posted by Hello



Harry Potter!!! Posted by Hello



The Baker girls discuss how stunning Maxanne looks in orange. Look how she's blushing! Posted by Hello



Old people. Even David I shall call old now. Posted by Hello



What is going on? There's my Mom's butt. And Diana is looking at Nick, I'm looking at the camera, and Nick is looking at me. Hmm... Posted by Hello



I love to lay on Anne Peel. Mal has cool hair. Posted by Hello



Random people. Posted by Hello



Nick eats Larry's knee. Posted by Hello



her head is SIDEWAYS! Posted by Hello



Aubrey! Posted by Hello



Chris! Posted by Hello



Maybe Mal is a closet aggie! Posted by Hello



Bob, Larry, and Nick! Posted by Hello